Jack Maurer Monologue by kristinmarting
July 22, 2009, 3:21 pm
Filed under: Camera's Eyes | Tags: , , ,

Jack Maurer
(written by Rachel Crawford, inspired by a Studs Terkel interview in his American Dreams book)

Chicago Monday. Black Monday. 1987. Standing there in the pit packed like sardines like some frozen stunned pack of animals watching

And the Dow goes down down down it goes

panic  confusion fear ripples through the hoard of suits, – masters of the universe except now – like a boulder thrown in a still pond smooth as glass becomes chaos
sweat stains and shallow breathing my shirt feels hot tight against my neck and I think and I whisper I say to everyone and no one get me out of here get me out but I stay

the promise life is good America is good the marketplace is good and all of us we just stared still and silent and afraid and maybe they lied, yes, maybe so

it’s like the floor falls out stomach in your knees it’s like you see – Depression, The Great – 1929 in your nightmares but realize you are awake

being born in the 50’s doesn’t mean being born in an amusement park.

After . the anxiety eases a little but once you have it you can’t shake it off waiting for you around the corner and you live your life with your expensive things
your baubles
your new car
like this thing or that daddy please can I, you say yes honey for you anything, the spectre of loss hot behind your eyes